Uga the Bulldog came by today, demanding proof of my Political Science degree. Uga: Claire Taylor, graduate of the University of Georgia, I am here to quiz you on polysci terms and facts to attest that you won't embarrass the School of Public and International Affairs at our fine institution. Me: Yessir. Uga: (sternly) You are aware this quiz would NOT be necessary if you contributed to the Alumni Association or if you actually worked in your field? Me: (contrite) Yessir. But I like to eat. Uga: (nods, slobbering on the carpet) I understand. Too bad. Now, who are your congressional representatives? Me: (confidently) Jared Polis in the House, Cory Gardner and Michael Bennet in the Senate. Uga: (eyeing my leg) Correct. And what case is in the Supreme Court right now that may affect Colorado? Me: (nervously) Nebraska and Oklahoma v. Colorado over NE and OK's inability of their executive branch to enforce their own states' laws. Uga: (sidling up to my shin) Inflammatory, but I'll allow it. Now, what is a "first past the post" system? Me: (trying to subtly back away) A voting system in which the person with the most votes wins, as opposed to proportional representation that allows for more than one winner. It contributes to the continuation of a two-party system, which when combined with a possible leader of the opposing party, purposefully leads to gridlock, weakening the federal system, a design put into place by people victimized by feudal lords over hundreds of years. Uga: (voice lowering, front paws now on my thigh) You really know your stuff, girly. Now for the final question: What is a caucus? Me: (grabbing a newspaper) DOWN! DOWN! (smacking that damn dog and avoiding the one question I didn't know the answer to) Uga: (embarrassed) Ah, ok. No worries. Gotta go. Keep the degree. Me: (relieved) Ok. Thanks. ***No dog was actually abused in this exchange ***
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AuthorClaire Taylor is an adventuress born of actor parents and raised by the dreams of the Eighties. When not working, she can be found petting wildlife in foreign countries among other adventures. After 10 years in Colorado and a short stint in Mexico, she's back in the U.S. Archives
March 2017
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